The importance to express a realization is big, regardless of who is watching.
I see now that as I shed my need for approval from the external world, I accept myself.
I see now that acceptance of any issue, an illness, a fact of life, precedes even surrender, and after surrender, after realizing that you need the help of something bigger than your will, only then, you can ask for help.
To think that people will not be interested in my “non art related” experience, is to deny the all-encompassing nature of creativity… and its healing power.
Why is it important for me to express all this now… probably because I can not stand the opposite, it is like living a double life, where, at the end, I am depriving others (and myself) from the fully assumed acceptance of my self, as I realize it, part by part.
About loving myself, I can say that I have a lot to learn, which, I realize means that I have a lot to learn about loving others.
When my judge steps in and says… but what are others going to think if you share this in your blog? this is very personal… I guess I feel vulnerable, and yet there may be people who actually find meaning in these words and honesty, that… like me need to take off the mask and stand nude in front of a crowd, as a form of self acceptance… writers do it through their characters, actors through living their roles, living vicariously the different parts that conform you, therefore acknowledging that they ARE you. That you are THEM and, as you do it, you transform them, you free them from their fixed form and push them to their next incarnation, welcoming your next SELF; the one that unfolds, whose needs mutate, endlessly evolving towards our Higher Self.